AimzsterHell's Kitchen Season 1 Awards!
July 4th 2008 01:30
Season 1 winner - Michael Wray
Picking up the success from Kitchen Nightmares USA, Gordon Ramsay turned up his temper ten notches in Hell’s Kitchen, abusing contestants, smacking plates of food against their chests in disgust, barfing out signature dishes, kicking bins in frustration and gleefully insulting complaining customers. Heh. So much for customer service he raves on so much in Kitchen Nightmares which makes me wonder if these diners get their food for free and I say, ‘Where can I sign up?’
While I find myself sighing dreamily whenever my personal crush appears with that glowering look, legs askance, arms folded across his chest, there are times when you do wish he’d just shut up, especially during services. In a situation where you’re told customers have been waiting for their entrees for an hour, why must you be subjected to additional four minutes of ranting and raving about whether or not you’d given up? But then, during these times, you should know to just utter two phrases ‘NO, CHEF!’ and ‘YES, CHEF!’ and leave it at that because Ramsay, contrary to the title of the show, IS God.
Whipping the contestants into shape with Ramsay are his two sidekicks, souz chefs Scott and MaryAnn. From what I’ve seen of Scott, he’s the type you can probably warm up to after ten rounds of beer while MaryAnn…well…just seems to be enjoying wielding the power she has over the contestants.
This season, we saw drama queens, tears, tantrums (not just from Ramsay either), backstabbings galore – all qualities of a good reality TV. And now that it’s over, I’d like to hand out some awards of my own :
What the-? award:
Wendy, 32, account manager
After stressing that her water wasn’t boiling fast enough, she poured cold water, thinking cold water would boil faster
I-Don-t-Understand-Why-He-Las ted-So-Long award:
Jimmy Casey, 25 purchasing supervisor
He was the one Ramsay liked to call ‘fat fuck’ and had the tendency to sweat – A LOT that Jean-Philippe the Belgian maitre’ d was compelled to plead with him to ‘Stop touching yourself’ after serving a woman who was alarmed that he seemed to be ‘sweating like a boar’. Jimmy was also a clumsy big oaf that sometimes left you scratching your head in bemusement. At one point, in an attempt to clean up his station, he accidentally threw away his lobster dish he’d just finished and when Ramsay started yelling for it, looked thoroughly confused as to where it had gone. Then he had a gall to scream back at Ramsay during one dinner service and said NO when Ramsay told him to come over. But despite his clumsiness, his endless sweating and buffoon-like antics, Ramsay seemed to really like him enough to make him stick around until episode 7. When he was finally eliminated, Ramsay gave him a warm goodbye, telling him to hold his head up and that he should be proud of himself. Frankly, I don’t see why Ramsay was so into him.
Best Confrontation award :
Between Jean-Philippe and a customer about the latter’s (lack of) education
A customer took offense to Jean-Philippe requesting for them to leave after they ordered pizzas (after waiting so long without food) to which JP replied, “I wish your education was as good as your voice”. The customer proceeded to hunt down JP to point out that he did, indeed, have an education – ‘a doctorate in music from the University of Southern California’.
Thank-God-He’s-Gone award :
Andrew, 24, office assistant
Let’s see…he made a crab risotto that made a customer throw up and was very indignant about it; he had a tendency of staring sulkily at Ramsay while being yelled at, like he was a teenager being yelled at by a father whom he hated, then tried talking back to him in that whiny, sooky manner; when his team lost a challenge and their punishment was to enter a combination to get to the store room, he tried putting a tape on the door to keep it open which was found out by Scott, costing the team further punishment; and the fact that his attitude was hated by everyone on his team. He was eliminated in episode 6.
Biggest Disappointment award:
Chris, 35, executive chef
For someone who was supposedly the most experienced cook in the kitchen, Ramsay felt Chris didn’t live up to his boasts and was eliminated in episode 5.
Biggest Wuss award:
Jeff LaPoff, 28, finance manager
He blamed his many stuff ups in dinner services on a variety of reasons – his kidney stones hurt (at one point, even managing to wake people up in the wee hours of the morning with his dramatic groaning and moaning); he’d ‘never worked on a fucking line before’ and even blamed Michael for just stepping in and running his station even though his station was sinking and needed desperate rescuing. In the end, the man who said “I’m not a quitter” did just that and after telling Ramsay he was an asshole to his face, threw away his apron and walked out during episode 3. Good riddance, I say.
Most Heartfelt Ramsay Goodbye award:
Elsie, 40, executive assistant & mother of six
In a move that showed Ramsay does have a heart, he looked truly sorry to let Elsie go in episode 8. At one point, I even thought he was looking for a way to get her out of that position by asking her if she felt she had had any help from the team during the night’s dinner service. But when she took the martyr role, lied and said yes, her fate was sealed. She got a hug and a kiss from Ramsay and a ‘I’m proud of you’. Sniff.
Sorest Loser:
Ralph, 36, professional chef
And who would have thought this guy was approaching 40 with the way he chucked tantrums after losing challenges? In episode 8 when he, along with Michael and Jessica lost the challenge to Elsie and was forced to watch her cooking risotto on Good Day Live, he proceeded to throw plates around in the sink, alarming even the usually-non-fuss Michael. Seriously, man, grow up.
She-Has-Balls award:
Jessica, 26, headhunter
This girl just did not shut up, did she? While any other contestant would have nodded, shook their head, said ‘yes, chef’ or ‘no,chef’, Jessica would just keep talking, sometimes even on top of Ramsay that I was surprised he didn’t slap her or banish her from the kitchens. But the icing on the cake was when she was sinking in the dessert station and she asked Ramsay if he could help her for a second. Heh.
Best Insult to Customer by Ramsay:
To two blondes who complained about Ramsay telling their girlfriend who complained about the wait, to ‘fuck off’ : ‘Can you tell her I mean it?’ To Jean-Philippe, ‘Can you escort these two ladies please? Back to plastic surgery?’
Best Ramsay insult:
This is a tough one and I really can’t narrow it down to just one so I came up with three :
‘It looks like a dehydrated camel’s turd’ – to Jimmy’s signature dish
‘I think you’re a plank. Plank means an idiot’ – to Chris
‘This is a really tough decision – cos you’re both crap’ – to Andrew & Wendy
Most repetitive Ramsay insult:
‘That looks like a dog’s dinner’
Best Challenge Reward :
Helicopter trip over LA which Jimmy won after making fruit flambé.
Worst Challenge Punishment:
Cleaning squid for the night’s service
Epilogue
Instead of the original prize of owning his own restaurant, Michael chose to join Ramsay in London to work alongside him in one of his successful restaurants. But Michael, having just married his fiancé and wanting to start a family, decided not to go through with the move and instead, started a knives company, Skull and Cleavers. He is currently the Executive Head Chef at The Standard in LA. Ralph opened his own restaurant, Fat Ralph’s Deli in New York. He also competed – and lost - on Iron Chef America.
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